Patience and Impatience While Reading

 I read 120 books in 2020. 

Here is the full list of my 2020 books: 

I love books. I love the library. I love book stores. I love Goodreads. I love talking to people about books. I struggle with reading.

If it takes me more than a day or so to read a book I get impatient. I speed up the audiobook, start doing the math of how much time it's going to take to finish, or, I put what I'm reading down in favor of something I can finish quicker. Of the 120 books I read in 2020, I only gave maybe 15 a five-star rating. I was choosing books based on the speed I could read them, and not based on the interest I had in them. 

And while this impatience paid off with an impressive 120 books, I can't say that I fully enjoyed reading in 2020. Looking back through this list I'm not even sure I remember what some of these were about. I put this arbitrary pressure on myself when literally no one cares. 

While I am overjoyed that my personality is made up of books, and my professional identity is wrapped up in books, I want to be happy with myself as a reader. 

And there are some things I am proud of: 

1. This was my most diverse year of reading. Only 31% of the books I read this year were written by white people. Here is a chart of author ethnicity in my reading this year: 

2. I read more poetry than ever before and I am becoming more comfortable consuming poetry. 

3. I found some new (to me) authors that I LOVE. (I will read anything Kacen Callender writes forever and ever.)

With all of this said, my goal moving into 2021 is to have more patience with my reading. And if that means I lose my (self-given) title of Queen of Reading, that's ok.